The Male Attention Drought

It had been weeks—no, months—since Tolu had received so much as a lingering glance from a man. At first, she didn’t notice. She was too busy thriving at work, making content, and planning her next big trip. But one evening, while scrolling through Instagram, she saw a post:

“Ladies, be honest—when was the last time a man looked at you like a meal?”

Tolu paused. When was the last time? She thought back. The barista at her usual café? Nope. The guy at the gym? He barely nodded. Even the security guard at work had started greeting her with the same energy. It was like greeting the automatic doors. It was pure routine, no admiration.

Confused, she checked the mirror. Skin glowing? Check. Outfit on point? Always. Confidence? Unshaken. So why was she invisible?

Determined to investigate, she stepped out the next day with an extra bounce in her step. She made eye contact, smiled subtly, even flipped her hair unnecessarily. Nothing. Not even a “Hey, gorgeous” from the construction workers.

It hit her, she had entered the Male Attention Drought. That strange period in a woman’s life when, for reasons unknown, men simply stop noticing. Maybe she’d been too focused, too independent. Maybe her aura screamed “I don’t need you” too loudly.

Frustrated, she called her bestie.

“Bro, do I still have it?”

He laughed. “You? Please. You just forgot how to see it. Walk outside and watch.”

Skeptical but hopeful, she went out again, this time, without trying. And that’s when she noticed it. There was a double-take from the guy at the fruit stall. She received a shy smile from the man in the elevator. She caught a lingering glance from the stranger in the bookstore.

Had they always been there? Probably. Had she been too caught up to notice? Definitely.

Tolu smirked. The drought was never real—she had just stopped looking.

But is it attention from the kind of men she actually wants? Well, that’s a story for another post.